| Author | Message | ||
| LJ Cohen
Moderator Username: ljc Post Number: 3974 Registered: 07-2002 |
It's your third birthday. We buy a wooden train, a length of track, an arched trestle. You line each car precisely, laugh when the magnets match engine to caboose, scream as your clumsy hands marry like pole to pole and the cars spring apart. I memorize the schedule of the Framingham line so I can drive you to the crossing in time for nap, the whistle of the 2:20 means an hour's peace, the lines ease from your forehead and my jaw. I wait as the rail's song fades, all hope of me on that train, gone, no ticket in my pocket. I think I can, I think I can. In the Rockies they chop up mile-long trains, couple an engine every few cars, power freight through the mountain passes. I am the only engine here. You wake grumbling like an old deisel. If the signals are with me, I can make it home before "Thomas the Tank Engine." Mr. Conductor will take us to the Isle of Sodor. It is lovely there. You name all your friends, Thomas, Edward, Toby, James. The phone rings. Dad is on the 6:20. We race him to the station. You slip a smiling Thomas in my hand, your eyes and his, cartoon round. I park the little train on the dashboard pointing towards tomorrow, our only destination. Once in a Blue Muse Blog | ||
| Barbara St. Aubrey
Member Username: elyse Post Number: 88 Registered: 01-2006 |
Only a parent or a grand could smile while reading this one - especially like the ending - oh yes and the friends naming the characters as the friends - wonderful stuff | ||
| Lazarus
Advanced Member Username: lazarus Post Number: 1156 Registered: 10-2005 |
Lisa I love the trip to the tracks for a nap, and this: You slip a smiling Thomas in my hand, your eyes and his, cartoon round And the race to pick up Dad. That was a memory for me. And the earth, bristling and raw, tiny and lost resumes its search; rushing through the vast astonishment- Ted Hughes, from His Legs Ran About. | ||
| Gary Blankenship
Senior Member Username: garyb Post Number: 6703 Registered: 07-2001 |
Lisa, lovely. A poem a grandparent can understand and a fine tribute to the you. Smiles. Gary A River Transformed The Dawg House December Fireweed | ||
| ~M~
Board Administrator Username: mjm Post Number: 6620 Registered: 11-1998 |
This was a favorite of mine in the Challenge, Lisa. I know you understand I only have so many honors to bestow. I would make no changes to this poem -- the way that it touches the heart needs no fixing. | ||
| Emusing
Moderator Username: emusing Post Number: 2817 Registered: 08-2003 |
Lees I was floored when I read this. I thought it was a brilliant spark off the challenge. I started to write a mock crit which would have been funny but too busy to get back and do a good job. This is great work. I'm really impressed. E | ||
| LJ Cohen
Moderator Username: ljc Post Number: 3994 Registered: 07-2002 |
Barbara, Laz, Gary, M, and E--thank you for reading and commenting on this one. I know it was quite far afield from the challenge poem, but that's where the challenge took me.  Lately, I've been focusing on staying in the specific, rather than the general in my writing. Glad this one spoke to you. best, ljc (ps, M--you know you have already given me you highest honor--"I would make no changes to this poem." Nothing else needed.) Once in a Blue Muse Blog | ||
| michael julius sottak
Advanced Member Username: julius Post Number: 2160 Registered: 12-2003 |
Lisa... you done got me going........... Riding on the City of New Orleans and Arlo singing after his dad.... Henry, my family's next door neighbor... an all american football player, bigger than a a goddamn bull... but he was from framingham and my dad (also all american) was from mattapoisett ... they butted heads constantly because they didn't actually meet until they had both retired on the beach in florida... but my dad's last day of life, he is looking up at this huge oak tree hanging over the pool screen... from Henry's yard and Henry comes over... Henry, when you gonna cut that goddamn tree down? (that battle had been going on for years.....) and Henry knew what was going on, said Ed.... I'll take care of it... and the old sonnofabitch did take the tree down! it was a gesture of pure respect the day after my dad died (what was that Frost quote, "good walls make good nieghbors") old Henry and I became such good friends, his daddy was an old railroad engineer running from Philly to Boston.... and his house & garage full of old memorabilia from those days...i'd take my daughters over to his house every christmas to view his pride and joy... a train set that ran all through the living room and around the christmas tree... yeah | ||
| WendyC
New member Username: wendyc Post Number: 31 Registered: 12-2003 |
sensitive and artful covering of parental stress in this one! | ||
| Kathy Paupore
Senior Member Username: kathy Post Number: 2995 Registered: 12-2003 |
Lisa, I enjoyed this very much in the challenge, and I enjoyed it again here. Your poems of children always pull at my heart. K | ||
| LJ Cohen
Moderator Username: ljc Post Number: 4016 Registered: 07-2002 |
Julius--I think I enjoy your comments almost as much as your poems. Wendy--thank you--yes, those years before we knew my oldest had Asperger's Syndrome were very stressful and sometimes the predictability of the train was the only thing that saved my sanity. Now he's poised on the edge of teenagehood and, well, sanity was nice while it lasted! LOL. Kathy--many thanks--us moms need to stick together. best, ljc Once in a Blue Muse Blog | ||
| M. Kathryn Black
Senior Member Username: kathryn Post Number: 3043 Registered: 09-2002 |
Lisa, I don't have any children but you made me want them. This was great reading. I've always loved trains, big and little. Best, Kathryn | ||
| Laurie Byro
Advanced Member Username: lauriette Post Number: 1554 Registered: 11-2003 |
lisa, enjoyed this very much thomas the tank engine are hot ticket items at the library you made this one accessible and lovely peace laurie |
